sanity and deadlines??

warning!this is a post about me stressing out about my thesis..if u'r also stress, please dun read this...

soo, i just finished my bachelor's thesis last may...and now, after just 4 months (including the two months of practical), i am starting my master's thesis...

basically, a master's thesis consists of THREE bachelor's thesis...and i was stressed out just by doing the proposal!!and i didn't even notice my peculiar attitude..that really meant something, right???

the story is, for my master's degree, my research is mainly about chemical modification of fibers...roughly i have named it the "production of biodegradable plastics made from non-wood derived cellulose acetate..."and i have three main objectives that includes determining the chemical composition of the raw material that i will be using (similar to Tien's thesis), the second one is the esterification of cellulose into cellulose acetate (similar to my bachelor's thesis,as it involves the main2 kimia ones) and lastly, to develop a product..so far, i have planned on producing biodegradable plastics laaa (similar to another coursemate of mine's thesis) or geotextile (similar to my 2nd attempt of tajuk for thesis)....conclusion?will be doing Tien's, mine, and Bren's thesis in most probably two to three years of my life, from now on...and i was unaware of the stress thats building up inside me...

while everyone else is just typing their 15-20 pg of proposal, i was doing the chapter 1-3 w/o a hitch...ended up stressing out but unfortunately, didn't have a friend to talk to..so kept on keeping it to myself for two freaking weeks!!!and last monday, my long time friend asked me to lunch..and i agreed and ended up doing no work at all..then tuesday was very stressing because all the piled up work on monday had to be done on that day..even the drive home was making me miserable because of the traffics and the long distance from ums to my house...felt dizzy at home since i was like working hard but no playing at all...so called my mom and pancing2 her to go to the kadai to look2 around when she arrives home...didn't do much good since it didn't distracted me from my guilt of not finishing my work, yet!!!and today, finished my work and found out that i was actually doing the big chapter 1-3, and not the proposal only..if i only did the proposal, it could have saved me about 70% of the energy and dilemma of finishing it up...DANGGG!!(but on the bright side, i did manage to finish three months' work in just 2 weeks..but still..nearly traded my sanity with the deadline there..)

and sooo today,i ended up jalan sendiri2 at megalong to release the stress by shopping for anything!!!manage to get myself a pretty blouse too..but at the same time, making my mom worried..got home and my mom hugged me and asked me what was wrong..and i ended up crying...again...(-_-")

begini rupanya kestressan org ambik master kan??whatmore if phd kan..that's why ppl selalu say phd = permanent head damage...means that Msc only temporary head damage la kan..heheh!!thank god!